Zombie Traitor Makes the Keynote Speech

Dick Cheney last night: “I’m sure glad Zell Miller’s on our side!”

Well, Mr. Cheney, so are we, so are we. Congrats, you’ve found someone who made you look almost boring last night – which, by the way, you were.

Zell Miller did an amazing impression of Joseph Goebbels in a speech that was only missing the Nazi paraphernalia in the background. What started out on Monday as the Convention of Fear got turned up 10 notches by Miller & Cheney to: If you don’t vote for Bush, you and your family will be crushed mercilessly, because the Democrats will sell your soul to the devil rather than fight the enemy.

The only solution for Cheney & Miller is to crush everyone in sight, including all Democrats, before they can think about crushing you. What a wonderful uplifting night from two of the most unstable and scary people in our government – and that’s saying a lot. Cheney no longer holds the nickname of Darth Vader – that now clearly belongs to Miller.

Cheney & Miller star in their sickening version of the movie Independence Day, where they and their boss see themselves as the heroes. After seeing their performance last night, if these two are examples of who you want running your government and your lives, you deserve them.

Zell Miller, says he will “be a Democrat until he dies.” What a joke. Even Benedict Arnold told the truth about being a traitor. If the people of Georgia had any sense, they’d have him impeached for impersonating a senator. Perfect: an unstable traitor picked to be the keynote speaker for George Bush. Have fun with that metaphor. What position in Bush’s cabinet would Miller fill: Secretary of Scare-the-Crap-Out-Of-You? He’s clearly well qualified for the job.

Miller & Cheney could only smear John Kerry and talk about the unwinnable/winnable war – which is it, by the way, Mr. Bush? Your buddy Newt Gingrich said you made an unfortunate “mistake” on this one – for once even he was right – even though we can be sure that you won’t admit it. You need to borrow one of those stupidly hideous pairs of flip-flop slippers from your deep thinking conventioneers.

Did you notice that neither Miller nor Cheney said anything about Bush’s actual plans for this country? The Repubs are sure Mr. Bush will have a plan tonight, but none of them seems to know what it is. But whatever it consists of only has to be compared to the failed policies of the last four years across the board that have crippled our economy, our military reserves and national guard, our foreign policy and international relations, our access to decent health plans, our children’s education, and divided our country in ways not seen since the Civil War.

Mr. Bush’s pit-bulls on stage last night kept talking about John Kerry’s record. As Mr. Cheney likes to say, “it’s fair game.” So is Mr. Bush’s record, and yours Mr. Cheney. He and you have failed in your job for four years and now it’s time to change the regime. General Merrill McPeak, former Chief of Staff of the Air Force, treats you kindly by saying that you are unprofessional and sloppy. I’d say it differently – welcome to the Republican version of Jurassic Park.

Dangerous dinosaurs are definitely on the loose.